Before disagreeing, name a case where the other person's view fits.
WhenAt a disagreement
“When another asserted something that I thought an error, I deny'd myself the pleasure of contradicting him abruptly, and of showing immediately some absurdity in his proposition; and in answering I began by observing that in certain cases or circumstances his opinion would be right, but in the present case there appear'd or seem'd to me some difference, etc.”
Benjamin Franklin, Autobiography, chapter IX, in Frank Woodworth Pine ed. (1916); events adult life; retrospective manuscript written 1771–1790. Read the source ↗
Why it works
He reported more pleasant conversations after conceding where a view could hold. It gives disagreement a precise boundary.
Start tiny
Say one true “That fits when…” clause (30 seconds).
What you’ll notice
Notice whether you are arguing about different circumstances.
When it slips
Do not fake agreement. If no case is clear, ask which case they mean.
Benjamin Franklin, Autobiography, chapter IX, in Frank Woodworth Pine ed. (1916); events adult life; retrospective manuscript written 1771–1790. Read the source ↗
Foundation: Small recurring actions with little setup. Choose anchors that fit your day.



